Wow. Thanks Baby Center

After we lost Averie I went through and deleted my pregnancy apps, unsubscribed from things and did as much damage control as I could. I didn’t need a constant reminder of how far along I was supposed to be in my pregnancy or an app asking me if I’d given birth yet. Unessessary torture is what I was trying to avoid. 

I joined baby center late last year to join some support groups with other women that had suffered 3rd trimester losses. They give you an option to put your family members in your profile so naturally I put Averie in because she is my daughter and all. 

A couple weeks ago I got the first dreaded email. I pulled it up and just stared at it. Ouch baby center. After all this time I’ve been a member you start sending me these now? I quickly unsubscribed and until this morning thought I was in the clear and then I got this: Some might think, well it’s been 19 months what’s the problem? Well unfortunately time doesn’t matter here. Every day is a constant reminder that Averie isn’t with us. I think about what stage she would have been every single day. I see other children and think, she would have been around that age, and try to picture what she would have been like. It doesn’t get any easier to receive reminders that she isn’t here and I don’t think it ever will. I don’t want reminders in the next 15 years saying “your teenager this week” that she should be graduating high school or even later when we expect  that she would have gotten married or had babies of her own. We torture ourselves enough but reminders just make it harder. Time goes on and everyone ages. Other children grow up but some of us parents forever have babies that weren’t fortunate enough to go through the stages. So thank you baby center I would love to take your poll and tell you if my toddler plays favorites but unfortunately I can’t. 

***insert trigger warning here***

I had my first NST (non stress test) today, and despite baby being a young one to start them, she did great and passed her test with flying colors. It was a little nerve racking for me watching the monitors and seeing and hearing her heart beat go up and up and then down. Luckily I made sure and asked a ton of questions so I wasn’t paranoid about what I saw. I assume I’ll get used to it considering how many I will be doing by the time she gets here and overall it does give me a sense of peace to have them done and I’m grateful for that.

In other news one of my baby apps told me today that baby girl is the size of a motorcycle helmet. I’m unsure how they came to that conclusion because motorcycle helmets are huge and in my opinion close to the size of a watermelon that baby usually measures around 40 weeks. I certainly look and feel like I’m carrying a motorcycle helmet so maybe they aren’t off entirely 😊

  1. alison

    September 20, 2016 at 1:07 pm

    Oh Crystal I’m so sorry they sent you that random horrible email! That is so annoying and hurtful. God!

    1. Crystal S

      September 21, 2016 at 12:41 pm

      Thank you Alison ❤️ Reminders like that are the worst 😞

  2. mamawifeyme

    September 21, 2016 at 7:35 am

    i don’t know what to say 🙁 🙁 i am sorry

    1. Crystal S

      September 21, 2016 at 12:41 pm

      ❤️❤️

  3. steriledaryl

    September 22, 2016 at 7:19 am

    Baby Center emails are the absolute worst. I have yet to figure out how to completely get them to stop. So sorry you have to deal with that!

    1. Crystal S

      September 22, 2016 at 1:45 pm

      Thank you ❤️ If you figure it out let me know!! 😊

  4. dearmilliejane

    September 27, 2016 at 5:12 pm

    I just seen this!! Your right it doesn’t matter how long it’s been, that dreaded feeling! My local parent centre in my small town continued to send me updates and magazines via post, asking if I wanted to help with fundraisers etc! We just got to take some breathes and ignore. Well I try haha ..

  5. cdhangelmommy

    September 30, 2016 at 12:48 pm

    I received a random email from Enfamil about 5 months after my daughter passed, even though I’d unsubscribed right after she died for the very purpose of avoiding all those emails. It took me off guard and really enraged me. I’m sure it’s very hard to get those types of reminders, no matter how much time has passed.

    1. Crystal S

      October 7, 2016 at 8:48 am

      Yes unfortunately time just makes it easier to deal with the pain overall but receiving reminders that your children are no longer here is never a pleasant thing.

  6. nkuttyil

    October 1, 2016 at 2:43 pm

    hiii! i’m reaching out to my fellow loss mom followers — I just made my blog private to keep it to those that have walked this path….so if you notice you can’t read it that’s why – you can request and i’ll approve it. hope you’re having an OK day xoxo

    1. Crystal S

      October 7, 2016 at 8:49 am

      Thank you for letting me know and still including me on your journey ❤️❤️ I’m sending a request right now 😊

  7. tniyati

    January 14, 2017 at 3:20 pm

    Baby center just wants to capitalize on new parents, they don’t actually care that you’ve suffered a huge loss. Same with the Enfamils of the world. If they have a chance of making money off you, they will hound you regardless of the terrible loss. It makes me so mad to read that you were still getting emails 19 months later.

    1. Crystal S

      January 14, 2017 at 3:40 pm

      Thank you so much and thank you for reading! I totally agree. What other reason would they send an email after I had unsubscribed? I should have emailed them, hey maybe I still will so it could possibly prevent it from happening to another grieving mother.

      1. tniyati

        January 14, 2017 at 3:42 pm

        I think you should. You deserve to be heard by the corporate sharks. And yes maybe that’ll save a grieving mother from the same experience. Im inspired by your compassion and strength.

  8. Why I’m done with BabyCenter & Dr Google – Living Through Our Loss

    March 28, 2017 at 1:02 pm

    […] realized it’s time to get rid of Baby Center. I should have done it awhile ago after the last stint they pulled, but I […]

  9. wonderwoman1988

    March 29, 2017 at 4:14 pm

    They did the same thing to me! I suffered a miscarriage and after signing up I couldn’t unsubscribe!!! Kept getting updates about a baby that wasn’t with us anymore. Thanks for slap in the face Baby Center! I hear ya!! You go girl!

    1. Crystal S

      April 5, 2017 at 8:48 am

      It seriously is the biggest slap in the face! I’m so sorry it happened to you too!

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