I have a lot of time to think these days. Amid the diaper changing and the feedings I spoil myself sometimes and allow myself to have a moment of thought.
Going through the loss of Averie has opened up my eyes a great deal. In the middle of my grief I felt very isolated. Consumed by my sadness, I felt like the world kept turning when my world had stopped. When I went out in public a part of me wished I had a shirt on that read “my daughter just died”. I’m not sure I wanted validation or to not think I’m suffering in silence. Maybe an “I’m sorry” from a stranger would have made me feel better. Who knows.
Now having stepped out of the darkest clouds of grief, I’ve thought, what if we all wore shirts that had our troubles on them? How interesting would that make this world? Would people be kinder to one another or more judgemental?
We walk around most of the time consumed by our own problems and troubles we fail to see that, most likely, everyone is going through something too. And although it may not seem as bad as what you are going through, it may be the worst thing that’s ever happened to them. And to them, it makes their world stop.
I’m on a mission to hear everyone’s stories because everyone has one and it’s fascinating to me. We are all connected, all made up of the same stuff but for some reason find ourselves sometimes so divided. I would never wish the loss of a child on anyone just so they could feel what I’ve been through, as I’ll never truly know how it feels to go through what you have. But I want to try, I want to empathize with you, I want to hear your story.